Let it Snow!!!
[thumb:338:l]Last night we received about 10 inches of snow!! Ariana cannot wait to get home from school today - she has been wanting to play in the snow for so many days!!! Jarett and Nicholas came over to visit today - Trenton loves them and misses them so much - even though they see eachother weekly. Clint was up at about 5am snow blowing the driveway and back patio - what a man!!
Trenton’s right eye has been bloodshot in the outer corner since yesterday. I thought the nap he took would make it go away, but no such luck. Today he is rubbing it - it is bloodshot and watery. I wonder if his eye is trying to turn in even more - we see Dr. Rubin on Monday and will ask him what he thinks.
I held Trenton’s hand today - for a long time, on purpose - closed my eyes and tried to burn the feeling in my brain. I see him smile and it makes me smile - but an indescribable pain hits me inside. I know that I need to cope with the reality of what will happen - I want to be strong for Ariana. I do not have the right to fall apart. I am her mother too - and she will need me to be strong. So I am learning to cope with this pain…leaning on God all the way!
I spoke with Robbie’s mom, Joyce, a few days ago. She has to choose between 5 different trials for Robbie. Robbie’s tumor has started to grow and he has already completed the radiation and Temodar protocol (Trenton has 7 more rounds to go before he is complete). Joyce is worried and feels overwhelmed by the decision she must make…How do you choose? All 5 are trials - each with their own side affects. Robbie is currently taking steroids to help with the symptoms he has been experiencing. My heart hurts for Joyce, Robbie, and their family….please say prayers for them as they make this critical decision. Please say prayers also for 0ther friends that are fighting: Meagan, Jacob, Cameron (tumor no longer stable), Justis……and so many other children and their families!!!
THANK YOU SO MUCH to the DeYoung and Downs families (our brothers and sisters in Christ)!!! They surprised us with gifts for Trenton and Ariana, as well as gift cards for Clint and I to use!!! May God bless your families - you have given us so much - love, encouragement, and joy!!!
Donna[newline]
Donna,
I love you so much!! I want to be there to hold you and let you know I share the pain inside you are feeling. Remember, you are strong- even when you let go and hurt.
You are a WONDERFUL MOTHER and the kids were specially placed in YOUR care- and Donna, honestly, Ariana will be fine because she has you. And you will have her. You will help each other; hold each other, cry together, talk together, pray together, laugh together, remember together, continue loving together, and most of all- Grow in Faith together.
You are always in my thoughts Donna, there has been many times I believe I have felt the pain you are feeling, a sort of connection I feel I have with you. My stomach and chest tightens up, I feel I can hardly breathe, my heart literally aches, and I cry uncontrollably. I think about that time you told me someone gave you advice: to just drive out to an open area and get out of the car and scream, this is what I feel like doing. I then grasp the calmness and comfort of the Lord inside me and pray my heart away.
I don’t mean to make you any more upset, but I hope I have comforted you some by sharing My feelings with you.
I love you,
↓ Quote | Posted December 9, 2005, 8:33 pmNiece
To my Dearest Family:
Well I am up early as you were writing the latest update. It is so hard to imagine what is happening to my precious Trenton. But as you lean on God for strength, so will all of us trying to make sense of all the things that have taken place. I find myself holding my children tighter than ever, because you just never know what the next day will bring and what new challenges you will have to face. I am so happy that you and the family have such a wonderful support group to help you through thoses days when you feel you just can’t go on. That part pains me that I am not able to help out with that. But in my own way with prayers and spreading the word about Trent and the prayers that come with that sharing that it helps me to find peace with the distance between us at this time.
On a lighter note my girls can only wish for that much snow here where we live and let me tell you they too would be anxious to get outside and play in all that snow. We have yet to get even a snow flake here in Fruita, Colorado. For me that is ok. I got enough of that white stuff when I was growing up their. So you tell the family to make Auntie a big snow man and take a picture of it for us and maybe you guys can send us a picture of some snow for my girls here. They would love that and seeing a picture of the kids. They talk to me about Trent and ask questions too. They love the photo gallery tons. Your trip for christmas sounds great. We are going to try and plan something like that for next years christmas, or maybe the summer. Just get away with the family and enjoy each other.
May god bless you this holiday season and through the 2006 year. Our love, hugs, and kisses are sent to you and the rest of the family.
I love you,
↓ Quote | Posted December 11, 2005, 9:26 amAuntie (Jackie)